Vitriol

Recently, I was made aware that I had been spitting and spewing a spray of vitriol when discussing current events and certain public persons. I sincerely apologize. Vitriol can be contagious, and, while not life-threatening or fatal like COVID, a few airborne droplets can infect those exposed and provoke a basic psychological response, which mental health experts call the vitriolic defense mechanism: the infected body produces more vitriol. And really, vitriol, apart from being an infectious agent is nearly always an inappropriate response to the pronouncements and actions of those certain public persons. The fault is mine, mea culpa, for resorting to vitriol. After all, when surrounded by clowns and stand-up comedians, there is something terribly wrong in the mental makeup, some mental defect, some imbalance—I plead temporary insanity—in anyone who did not respond with uproarious laughter when professional sex therapist Marjorie Taylor Green advanced the theory that discrimination against poor white men leads them to addiction to porn and video games. If she headlined in a comedy club instead of the House Oversight Committee, her shtick would have us rolling in the aisles, and I would fully expect her to riff on starting an INCEL self-awareness support group. Or even an INCEL dating app, which, if successful, could cause the porn industry to collapse, resulting in serious economic repercussions in INCEL strongholds. But an INCEL Self Help Manual might be just what the sex therapist ordered. [Some people are saying that the nude photos of Hunter Biden titillated Marjorie and her INCEL buddies when shown at their regular get-together in the basement of a pizza parlor outside Baltimore. I’m not saying it’s so. I’m just repeating what I heard.]

Laughter Trumps Vitriol: I laughed appropriately at the scene in Born in East L.A. of the hordes of people atop the California hills, ready to invade the U.S. I laugh even harder when Marjorie counts 6 billion of them. I would never laugh at anyone who suffers from dyscalculia.

And what about her fine sense of irony when advancing her plan for a national divorce. The Disunited States of America would split up according to voting preferences. Since the blue states support the red states financially, I suppose they would have to pay alimony. Marj is silent on the alimony issue but has a partial plan for who gets custody of the children: The hordes (somewhat less than 6 billion, I would hope) who flee from the evil blue state woke leftists into the welcoming embrace of red state freedom lovers would be prohibited from voting for 5 years, a kind of quarantine to ensure that they are truly free of all blue-state viruses before they come of age and can be trusted to participate in the unwoke adult world of red state politics. I don’t think Marj realizes that if some red staters tried to sneak illegally into blue states in order to work and send remittances home to their impoverished red state families they might well get burned by the Jewish space lasers that circumcise the globe every 24 hours.  

Ms Green’s true color came out when she wore, at the State of the Union address, an all-white costume, complete with a white, fake (I hope) fur, accessorizing her haute couture moment with a white helium balloon.  Only a comedically creative mind such as hers would think to call out the President’s handling of the Chinese spy balloon by imitating one. Although costumed clowns per se do not usually tickle my funny bone, I laughed when the camera panned on her.

The camera also panned on Ms Green’ soul sister, fellow heckler and clown, Lauren Boebert, who totes an AR 15 instead of a seltzer bottle. Ms Boebert, along with her comedic colleague, George Santos, has co-sponsored a bill to make the AR 15 our national gun. After all, as she claims, if Jesus had had an AR 15 his government wouldn’t have crucified him. This example of her finely honed sense of Biblical knowledge has gotten some blowback from humorless and vitriolic Christians quick to shout “Blasphemy” instead of cutting her some well-deserved slack because, after all, she stated that our founding fathers intended that the Church should be the Ringmaster in our big top.

Instead of spewing vitriol, I applaud the Grand Old Party for its creativity in the field of Curricula Vitae. Three freshmen Representatives, well, one freshman and two freshwomen, have been particularly industrious and merit a few chuckles, if not outright laughs. Sadly, the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence are the closest the pitiable left can come to that supreme artist, George Santos’ Jew-ish drag queen.

The list of GOP/MAGA performers deserving of applause and laughter is too long to mention them all, but how about a giggle, if not a groan, for the Horned QAnon Shaman in his quest for vegan prison food, the Pillow Man and his tireless, but never sleepless, search for missing votes, the Groomer Governor (Trump’s nickname for him) opposed to anything that would make school children uncomfortable (except his presence at high school parties). And let’s not forget the Trump Trading Cards. Exquisite.  

The Republican Party has chosen entertainment over politics and their performances deserve laughter or groans, but never vitriol. We should all applaud them.